random,  rants,  the writing life

I Have Haters – Now What? #haters #writers

So one of the facts of life about any creative career where you are in the spotlight is you’re going to have haters. Not everyone is going to like what you create – and that’s okay. I often get emails from writers/artists (especially in the occult world) asking me how to handle haters who make it their life goal to try to take down any artist or content creator they don’t like. Apparently I have a reputation for enduring these types of haters well.

First, let me welcome you to the club. Having such dedicated haters (i.e. stalkers or obsessed anti-fans) means that people are actually reading, listening to, or seeing your work and they’re REACTING to it. Some with more jealousy and/or self-righteousness than others. You have done your job as an artist. You’ve evoked a reaction from your audience. Sadly, not all reactions will be good. That’s just the nature of the beast.

I, too have had entire groups dedicated to my downfall (hey, some obsessive people have WAY TOO MUCH time on their hands). Of course, I also write NF, and there are a lot of stuffy know-it-alls in the niche I write in (anyone in the occulture knows how true this is). I just ignore it and let them have their little “I hate Steph” club. If that helps them feel validated, superior, and lets them sleep at night, great. The more they bitch about me – the more my book sales go up. Especially the more famous the hater is (and I’ve been whined about by some pretty big names in the field and each time I sell tons of books after every tirade – keep bitchin’ boys). So – that said – when you find out you have haters — don’t do anything.

Yeah, you heard me. Nada. Zilch. Accept that it’s part of the job and keep doing what you do, and let them waste their time and energy hating you. What a sad existence that must be. They send you a shitty email, drop it in your stalker/hater folder and don’t grace it with a response. Out of sight, out of mind. They post shitty stuff to your website comments – DELETE. They make shitty comments on your YouTube. DELETE. They write a bad review – don’t worry, your fans will bury it eventually. Every great artist/author/musician has gotten shitty reviews by someone. Besides, sour grapes reviews are easy to spot and intelligent people roll their eyes at them. Your haters are trying to get your attention (I’m convinced most of them secretly want to be you) and they want you to react. Don’t give them the pleasure of knowing they’re getting to you by not letting them get to you. Basically — mind your business and keep producing.  

And that is why any creative line of work requires a thick skin. The better your work does, the bigger the spotlight, the more shade and hate thrown your way. You have to be able to endure the hate and continue on in spite of it. You have to develop the philosophy, “Your hate does not invalidate my work.” 

Delete and keep creating. You can do this.

Steph is an award winning and bestselling author of thrilling steamy and paranormal romances, dark urban fantasy, occult horror-thrillers, cozy mysteries, contemporary romance, sword and sorcery fantasy, and books about the esoteric and Daemonolatry. A Daemonolatress and forever a resident of Smelt Isle, she is happily married and cat-mom to three pampered house cats. Her muse is a demanding sadistic Dom who often keeps her up into the wee hours of the morning. You can contact her at swordarkeereon@gmail.com

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